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Through my eyes

Through my eyes

Author: Kasia Yoko
Date: 2019-01-25

For many years my need to venture on my puerile adventures has bothered people around me, especially my family who believe that all my extreme escapes, which I plan each year with meticulous projection, are some childish form of escapism.

Two weeks ago, I was wiping the sweat off my brow with my sleeve, sipping on a Red Horse Pilsner in a roadside cafÈ in the village of Moalboal, on Cebu Island. The bar was filled with expats from all over the world and I was right in the middle of their banter.

German, Dutch, Swiss, English and a mute Belgian, represented the nationalities gathers there, and I so wanted to connect with this group of people living in the Philippines, because I know that if you want to find the real story, you will hear it from the expat.

From the corner of my eyes I heard one man saying; "We have decided to leave the Philippines. We just cannot handle this filth and the rampant lawlessness." I looked up to see a man in his sixties of European descent, who later turned out to be Canadian, "My wife and I have decided to leave for Thailand."

"Thailand." Another guy sneers, "Why would you want to go to Thailand Its expensive"

"We don't care if Thailand is expensive, we just need to get out of here. Living in the Philippines has become unbearable for us." He moved away as everyone ignored his rant.

There was so much I wanted to find out from these guys and it took no time at all for me to introduce myself and engage in conversation. I was welcomed and even though I was the only woman, there were no issues, maybe only from the Filipino wives and girlfriends who sat on the other side of the bar and were staring me down with a certain sense of insecurity, but I smiled sweetly and ignored their daggers.

Besides me sat a 64 year old Austrian gentleman, Joseph. He must have been beautiful in his prime, he had a long ponytail and piercing blue eyes and he did not make direct eye contact.

He shared his story about the time he spent in prison for not paying maintenance to his Filipino wife. "She has found another guy with a bigger pension." He told me. I tried to be sympathetic and he carried on.

"It's a strange thing here in the Philippines," he told me, "Did you know that it is common for husbands to allow their wives to have Western boyfriends, even to marry them as long as they send money home. The mother of my child has three western boyfriends and her husband allows her to carry on."

"Three boyfriends." I exclaim with a wide grin, "Your girlfriend must be very good" he looked up and for the first time looked me straight in the eyes and burst out laughing, "Oh yes you are right, she is very good."

We sat a little longer, we ordered another beer when a little boy ran up to Joseph and climbs onto his lap. Joseph introduced him and telled me he belonged to his new girlfriend, "She is 22 years old you know."

We sat in silence for a while, the little boy happily sat on Joseph's lap sipping Fanta oblivious to what we were discussing. "What is Joseph running away from " I wondered to myself, and as his story unravelled, I knew that these encounters are the reason why I travel to the ends of the world. I listened carefully, searching Joseph's eyes, which were by now blood red and soaked with tears.

We're all just trying to make the most of our time on this planet, escapism is just one way to make some lives bearable. I hope you are having a beautiful week.