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"Oranges And Lemons"

"Oranges And Lemons"

Author: Mala Gounden
Date: 2017-02-03
I was born to adorable, attentive parents and raised in a lovely home were love and tenderness reigned. I enjoyed being as carefree as a child delighting in the simple pleasures of climbing trees, chasing butterflies and playing hopscotch. Little did I realize that it would be carried away like whispers in the wind.

Dad was offered a job with better prospects. With the move came the difficult decision of sending me to board. There were no schools in the vicinity. I hugged my parents as they left me at the boarding house. My heart was as heavy as my suitcase. I never felt lonelier or sadder in my life.

The daughter of the house was envious of me and made it her twisted obsession to make my life a living hell. I used to perform better than her in school so she would tear my books. The more she tore, the more I rewrote and the better I performed, scooping most of the awards. This fuelled her anger.

I was constantly ridiculed and belittled. She spat hateful words, stuck gum in my hair, put spiders under my pillow and cockroach in my lunch box. She tortured and tormented me. All my clothes were smeared with thick black polish. Washing polish of clothes was no easy chore for a child. As I washed and scrubbed my spirits burst like soap bubbles. I was kicked so hard that I wore the pain and swelling for days. My legs sometimes looked as if had blueish green and rust coloured tattoos. I still bare scars. Some horrors are unmentionable. Pain and suffering came to keep me company.

She harassed everyone that befriended me until eventually I spent my breaks alone while my classmates shared schoolgirl jokes and childish giggles.

I wrapped up the little girl I was and tucked her away.

The last day of primary school eventually arrived. My suitcase seemed lighter. My childhood sabotaged, innocence lost!

For years I would believe that I was worthless. My past followed me through my adult life and held me hostage. I built a wall of isolation around me. It eclipsed my happiness. I harboured bitterness. Pain became my loyal friend. I fell into a deep depression and sought solace in food and medication.

I hit rock bottom before I realised I had given that bully the power to continue abusing me. I decided to pack away my past. I started believing I was worthy. I resorted to following my passion and excelled at it. I am now a published poet, a writer and a storyteller. I am my own cheerleader living my best life!!

"Hush little baby, don't say a word".