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Through My Eyes

Through My Eyes

Author: Kasia Yoko
Date: 2013-05-02
"If you light a lamp for someone else it will also brighten your path." - Buddha
Recently my good friend Allan made a profound statement while discussing my present state of mind, he said, "How was it possible to create that chaos and actually feel those emotions if the event didn't actually happen? It all started in your mind. So imagine what else you could create and how good you could feel if you chose the right scenarios."

Wow that was a huge statement even for Allan, I made him repeat it over and over again until I was sure that I not only remembered it but I also saw it in my mind's eye. By the time I finally got it and felt it, something beautiful happened inside me. The penny dropped and I felt so much better.

Of late I have been complaining of getting old. I just feel somewhat drained and run down. My good husband is supportive in a masculine kind of way. He feeds me vitamins, energy booster bombs and herbal elixirs, asking me kindly to stop whinging already.

Is it not weird how there comes a time for all of us when we just start feeling it? It sneaks up on us in the dead of the night, like a peeping tom and the next thing you know is you wake up feeling violated and vulnerable, for me those are obvious signs of getting old.

Trying to analyse my position, I had to be honest with myself. There is no denying, time is flying by. My children are adults who do not need adult supervision anymore, or motherly love for that matter, I am told it's a phase but I have my doubts. My home seems empty and quiet and more and more I am starting to get jokes like; "The thing I enjoy most about my retirement is that little nap after breakfast."

The more I think about it the more I understand that the more I think about it the more real it gets. So I try to push it out of my mind, but it is harder than it seems. However all it takes is a few glasses of pink bubbly on the sundeck of a local beachfront hotel, with a kind and sensitive friend, and my delusions are lifted.

Today when I feel like that feeling is creeping in I repeat Allan's words; "How was it possible to create that chaos and actually feel those emotions if the event didn't actually happen? It all started in your mind. So imagine what else could you create and how good you could feel, if you chose the right scenarios."

We really can change the way we feel. It is just about changing our attitudes to life. No one will make us happy or loved or young for that matter, it's all about creating the realities that we want to feel everyday.

From the moment we wake up, we can decide, "Am I gonna whinge the whole day?" Or "Am I gonna love the space I am in?" So if you are feeling low and drained, boost up on some strong multi vitamins, get a Vitamin B injection (they are fantastic energy boosters) invite a cool friend for lunch and do what it takes to get back to the 'happy zone' you know you can. And remember Robert Gary Lee's profound words "Wisdom is nothing more than healed pain."